25 years ago I worked as an RN in a small community hospital Intensive Care Unit
(ICU). It was there in this tiny 6 bed unit I learned one of life’s greatest
lessons. 7 PM, I arrived for the night shift, 12 hours in a cramped room with our
patients against one wall. This night my patient was Pearl, she was 97 years
young. Her chart said “heart failure.” Pearl, my patient was someone’s mother,
daughter, sister, and friend; looking at her it was hard to think she was a bubbly
little girl playing with her friends, spying a cute boy, a young bride, and
mother. Pearl was a grade school teacher for over 30 years, a full life lived,
a life played out over nearly a century. She looked frail and alone here in her
ICU hospital bed. Noted on her chart was “sole survivor, no family,” this meant
that no one was coming.
evening I arrived for my shift, Pearl seemed sad. I took my familiar chair next
to her; she reached out and with a fierce grip she took my hand. There we sat,
not one word passed our lips, yet it seems we shared a lifetime of stories. On
waking Pearl would say, “It’s time for me to go home to the Lord.” Death she
would state boldly was late.
On arriving for my next evening shift, I checked in on her, there was a modest decline
in her vitals, Pearl appeared weakened. Handing off my other patients to my
colleagues, I sat with her, I held her hand, without uttering a word, we both
knew she was finally leaving, going home as she put it. And so I sat with her,
just the two of us amongst the bleeps and cries of machine and anguished souls
in adjacent beds. Slowly her life slipped away, she was off on her last date of
the night. Death had finally come. As her rattling breath came to its last
inhale, her eyes opened wide and a smile spread across her face, she squeezed
my hand, then let go she was gone.
I thought death had arrived late, in
retrospect, death’s seemingly late arrival turned out to be an opportunity. In
our last hours together, my patient and I bonded; we experienced something far
more important than either of us would ever realize.
As Pearl’s nurse, ensured she received the best of care, and dignity; over the
past 8 or 9 days, Pearl became my teacher, and before she left, there was one
more student for Pearl. I didn’t know it then I had much to learn from my
patient. How living robustly and fully brings fulfillment to ones life, facing
life’s difficulties head on with courage, importance of friendship and love-
the foundation of life.
Today, nearly a quarter century later, I share what I learned long ago, in an
old community ICU with my loved ones, and patients alike.
I hope my teacher of some 25 years ago has found the peace she was looking for.
I learned much from her, I think of her daily and thank her for the gift she
shared with me on her last night in that long ago ICU bed where we sat holding hands.
Posted by: G M Chase @ 11:32 pm
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